But three weeks ago, I seriously struggled with my own self - worth. I am honestly not where I want to be or I thought I would be in 2017. Obviously, God had other plans. But, so many things can be thrown at us in our everyday world. Goals do not get accomplished. Plans are changed or even derailed. And, what we see, can lead us to compare our lives. It can make us question our worth and our purpose.
We can rack our brains, wondering why? Or, "where did I go wrong?" Most times, I don't get many answers when I do this. But, I do it anyway. I fuss and fight with God until I give up.
But, I did realize something a few weeks ago. I hindered my progression in certain areas in my life. It was not due to finances or not having the right connections, but my hindrance was due to the lack of belief in myself.
I didn't think that my desires were good enough to fight for. I didn't believe that I was good enough.
I let how others viewed me (or my perception of their view) dictate my worth and feelings. I let fear conquer my own confidence. Fear not only conquered my self-confidence, but it was deteriorating my confidence in God.
This is not good, by the way.
So, now that I have come to this realization. I am going to try very hard to make sure that my footsteps are not directed by the paths of others. I want to make sure my footsteps are ordered by God and a true belief in me.
I believe I was listening to one of Bishop Joseph Walker's sermons, where he said that God does not provide someone else vision in your life and not tell you. Yet, God thinks that each of us is competent enough that he can show us the path, plan and purpose in our lives first. He values us. Of course, there may be some people who can confirm some things, that I should or do already know. But, I want to be my #1 cheerleader. And, I want to encourage myself to be the best I can be and conquer the world.
Despite what life throws at you or how people treat you, know your worth. I don't know, if you have someone or something trying to make you feel less than or not good enough. Maybe, it is a family member or a friend, a co-worker or a neighbor. Before you allow them to get the best of you, take a step back and re-evaluate your truth and value. What do you know about you?
Secondly, determine the value of the attack or the attacker. The people, who have tried to make me feel less than in my life, were not the most valuable people in my life. And, I no longer want to give these people more thought and more time than I have to. I want to invest and spend time with others, who want to be with me.
Lastly, take action.
You may have to pray for strength. Get in your quiet space. You may have to write it out. Speak affirmations about yourself until you believe them. This last one is so hard for me, but I have been practicing speaking over myself these last few weeks.
Earlier this month, I thought about putting a mirror in one of my rooms, of course so I can fix my weave if I need to. And, if I ever got a chance to put on makeup, I would have it right in this room, because I get too lazy to head to the bathroom lol. But, then my husband shared a quote with me that will take the place of the proposed mirror.
How do we feel about ourselves?
I wish some situations or some people wouldn't bother us. Unfortunately, they will. But, I hope you will surround yourselves by people who truly love you. The kind, who say " I wish you realized how amazing you are." They are the people, who view you correctly-- in all your glory and awesomeness!
Not so that your head can be blown up, but those are the people who love you best and see the real you. Let's work on our self-worth, y'all!
Pray for me, too. Because I just want to grasp a small taste of how God really, really sees me and let this consistently dwell in my spirit. He says that we are of a royal priesthood. Do we believe that? If you get a chance check out this song by Anthony Brown and Group Therapy. It's titled "Worth"